“I Want to Change the World.” With, Uh, a Dictionary?

  I remember, way back in 2007, I picked up Sugar magazine on a whim and read through the articles on makeup, hair, teenage boys being arseholes, etc., before coming to Ladmag. Usually I hardly read it because I think it’s a bit crap, but the cover star caught my eye, so I flicked to what was my first ever Gerard Way interview.

  I didn’t know he had witnessed 9/11 or was struggling with a drink problem, or liked Green Day, but I discovered all as I read about scary blackbirds outside hotels. I had heard perhaps four My Chem songs by that time – mostly on TV or radio – and I liked the odd lyrics, slightly disturbing imagery and black nail polish. I kept the interview for years (MCR fast became my favourite band) and pinned it to the cork board above my desk when I acquired one.

  I’m getting to the point, hang fire.

  This afternoon I was sipping Lemsip while waiting for my laptop to load up when I re-read the interview for the n-th time and it occurred to me that a lot of people probably don’t like MCR because they don’t understand most of what they’re saying. Not that fans of different bands have certain amounts of brain cells or anything, but seriously.

  No one in that band can answer a question straight out! For example:

  Question: “So everyone should be given a chance to like MCR, right?”

  Gerard: “I think people often make the mistake of discounting a younger audience, which is a form of elitism…”

  Gee’s response took up a lot of lines so I won’t type it. But it involved thirteen-year-old girls wearing Dookie T-shirts, audience and mohicans.

  Don’t know what elitism is? You probably lost the thread right there. I know it took me a while, and according to my school uniform I’m one of the shinest spanners in the metaphorical toolbox.

  So, the next time you get a lesson on how to write an essay, don’t fall asleep. You’ll need it if you fancy watching Life on the Murder Scene.

  I’m now off to plan dodgy fanfictions that will be my friends’ Christmas . The torture I put myself through for those guys…

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