I Used to Say There’s Nothing in this World to Make Me Suicidal. I Was Wrong.

I know for a fact that no one’s going to read this until at least Monday, because the whole of Europe is completely fixated on Eurovision.

Which, I’m sorry, is a modern-day League of Nations.

Okay, so there have been a few good Eurovision acts. I love me a bit of Abba… I also saw that Bucks Fizz song on TV the other day, that’s pretty funny. I spent the whole video trying to guess the year… I thought 1976 until they took the skirts off, then I wentย for 1982…ย it was 1981 in the end.

Anyway, I think Lady Gaga should be an honerary European for the weekend with that Judas song (which has Judasย wearing Jesus’ crucifixion gear in the video, I believe? What’s up with that? Judas committed suicide after he sold Jesus out. No spiky crown).

Another complaint: why are all these male acts talking about wanting girls? I’m sorry, but if Jedward aren’t at least half gay, there’s some issues with the universe.

I didn’t even know Estonia’s in Europe.

So, if anyone can explain to me what the point of Eurovision is, I’d appreciate it. I’m currently going through my grandparents’ families trying to find someone who isn’t from Europe originally. It’s not worked, I might vote Malta and be done with it.

Ooh, Greece is on. I bloody hope my mum’s watching this. She and Michelle could get the locals to sing along. Or not. There’s rapping.

Oh yeah, Russia always do well, Mr. Norton, because the Eastern Bloc is very much alive in this competition.

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27 thoughts on “I Used to Say There’s Nothing in this World to Make Me Suicidal. I Was Wrong.

  1. I believe the point is to learn Geography. And possibly to provide evidence that the Russian sphere of influence is still very much a sphere.

    It’s not even squared shaped.

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  2. Your Wrong and your right. (this is getting a bit too Katy Perry now. But it’s okay. I won’t say your yes and your no. Because that wouldn’t make sense.)
    Wrong, because whilst you posted this, i was watching Midsomer Murders. But i did watch Azerbaijan, Romania and someone else. Some other stupid sounding country. And i never even knew the country you mentioned existed. Until now of course.
    Ad your right, because i don’t get the point of eurovision either. The only bit i thought i got was where unfamous, un-heard of people got up and sang for their country. But then Jedward and Blue were on it, so now im confused.
    It’s like QI and Have I Got News For You though. I like them, but i really don’t get their scoring system.
    Anyway. Off to write about zantes Navagio Beach for geography. A picture of you is going in my geography book. Sorry about that. It’s all 6 of us. I need to prove ive actually been there. And the picture of just lauren and i showed the spot too clearly and made me look all pale and pasty.
    Everyone seems to be going all religious lately. Lady Gaga, thingy, thingy 2, and moi. I call it a trend. I asked agnes something about moses building the ark today in R.E. Then realised my mistake. Thankfully, she corrected me. But know i know. It wasn’t MOSES who built the Ark, It was EVAN. But why they built it, and where it disappeared too still confuzzles me.
    Never mind. I better go because this is turning into an essay. You dn’t have to read it all. Bit late if you just read that sentence though.
    Reading is good for the brain. Therefore, am helping you, and you are helping me. Sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes. Im typing too fast to see properly.

    x ๐Ÿ™‚

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  3. Jesus christ!!!! I didn’t realise it was THAT long. SORRYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!! You really don’t have to bother reading it. It makes you look popular though i suppose.
    And i need to stop referring to religious people. Instead, i will shout, FATHER WAY, rather than JESUS CHRIST, when some fattie sits on my foot with a chair.

    anyway. My half way through the year resolution is to shorten comments. So goodbye.

    x ๐Ÿ™‚

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  4. And i just read the bit where you say your eyes hurt. Im sorry. My comments dont help.(Buy eyedrops, they’re really fun!)
    I think im looking a bit on the deperate side now, with all these comments. so this is my last one (not forever you poof). Bye.

    x ๐Ÿ™‚

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    1. I was still laughing from the scoring system bit when the image of you shouting ‘Father Way’ as a chair landed on your foot entered my mind.

      Oh my God, you make me laugh. By all means, carry on with the essays (and the half-year mark is June, not May. Though I thought it was March and was about to type that when I remembered).

      Who are Thingies 1 and 2? Ellen and I? Hmmm. The Ark ended up in Russia, I think, on top of a mountain. Noah built it because God told him there would be a flood to wipe out all the shitty humans, but God liked the animals and Noah so he told Noah to build an ark and save the animals. Kind of a cosmic RSPCA, if it helps.

      Points for correctly spelling Azerbaijan, but you got the ‘your’s wrong. It’s you’re.

      For the record, Father Way was very religious. He was totally into God… He was just into Frank more ๐Ÿ˜›

      I win on the essay blog. My wrists hurt. IT’s STIGMATA!

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  5. WOW!!! Can i come and help you kick the evil forces non-existent butt???? Great, i’ll be right over. What shall i bring? tea towels (essential), cheap primark raybans (where would we be without ’em?), er, how about permanent marker so we can —–

    hang on. You got a tattoo and didn’t tell me. Im ashamed of you.

    not really!!!!!!! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaa ha. HA!

    sorry about the your/you’re.
    Yes, i think i shall start using father way. Its much more appropriate around my r.e. teacher, who shouts at people in the corridor for using the lords name in vain.But i don’t get it. Is jesus or God the Lord?

    Yes, you and ellen can be the things if you want, its just i couldnt think of into religiony people then. But originally, ellen is thing 1, and i am thing 2, according to sensei. Which is why i got the fringe.

    enjoy your homework. No more tattooing for you my dear.
    im off to watch saturdays dr who.
    lookin forward to Tighter too.

    x:

    p.s hows the mother? Glad she’s back?

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    1. What’s this about tattoos? Oh, stigmata?! Yeah. I actually have several…

      Jesus is both (Google the Holy Trinity, he’s 3 dudes at once, which is a bit confusing).

      “And… it’s Thing 2 in the ring! Thing 2 taking the lead! Thing 2 winning!” or whatever. Cool.

      There is no mention of tea towels in Unholy. Just a lot of hair product, some books and some bath towels. Oh, and a matress.

      Mum is fine and doing ironing ๐Ÿ˜€

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  6. Thats always nice. You haven’t got any tattoos of bunnies on your arm have you? You’re not that hardcore yet.
    I like the way i am winning this fight in your head. Is ellen on the floor screaming in pain yet? good good. that’s what i like to hear.
    Er, this holy trinity thing sounds way too detailed and confusing. We spent all of yesterdays re lesson talking about animals (we are doing Kosher). Agnes thought sheeps had paws. And i was talking about moses and his ark. jemma was picking her nose and examining the shiity stuff that came out, and laura went to the hospital to have her tumor removed.
    fun times in r.e.. Luckily for us, agnes knows how to use a bible. Another group have to go back at lunch to be taught how. hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahajhahahah.
    Father way, look at the time. I must be off.

    toodle-pip. Enjoy your school day. We have a royal visit, prince harry is coming to open the already opened english block, but officially.

    I lie. Its the Duke of gloustershire. But hazza is much more interesting.

    essay over, now for the conclusion.

    Goodbye. x ๐Ÿ™‚

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  7. ”” ”” ”’ ” ‘ ‘ ‘
    ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘
    ” ”” ””’ ‘ ‘ ‘ ”
    ‘ ” ‘ ‘ ‘ ” ‘ ‘
    ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘ ‘

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    1. Chloe wrote ‘Draw Me Da Penis’ on my arm yesterday when we were suppoed to me revising. Then she drew one on my hand, complete with labled ‘jizz’.

      I kid you not.

      If it had been Harry, I would have expected an autograph ๐Ÿ˜€

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  8. The point of the Eurovision is to aid the drinks industry – you cannot watch it and survive mentally without copious amounts of alcohol. Of course, those under-age have to just take their chances with their mental health.

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    1. I knew there had to be a financial reason! Haha, thank you for pointing it out!

      I’m under age, I was thinking I might take my chances with the alcohol… At least it would dim the singing, right?!

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      1. Alcohol actually allowed in your own home with parental supervision. In the interest of being kind to my child I allowed her a drink while she watched ๐Ÿ™‚

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  9. Hmmmmmmm. When you get drunk frank, there are 3 possible things that could happen.
    1. You could turn into your mother.
    2. You could turn into your father.
    3. You could turn into both of them.

    now,considering the outcomes frank, i thuink it would be best if you stayerd sober and STICK TO THE COFFEE. For everyones sake. Please.
    Pretty please. (if i have to beg you, i will)

    x ๐Ÿ™‚

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  10. WOW!!!! You could turn into the MTV advert monster, which is quite cute actually. Especially as it has a pet jumpy thing, and changes colours as it walks.
    Clearly, i watch too much mtv. Mainly on saturdays or in the holidays. I sit down with crumpets and coffee, and watch super sweet 16, followed by an old top gear, then a flick through music channels, then to some other rubbish stuff, until it is time to make mum breakfast in bed.
    Dad is already up, and in the garage at this point, so don’t worry. Its not that i don’t love him or anything, its just he’s had breakfast. Im not a devil child…..

    Why were you sitting on the floor in your maths room, being bored? i was in ICT when you sent that text, and could have sub-blogged for you, but was too busy advising my teacher on what to do with her love life. Nope, seriously. That was what i was doing. No lies. I promise.
    FATHER WAY (hahahahaha. my new saying is very handy.) i swear that this post is getting more comments than the concert one. I suppose half of tyhem are from moi, and the other half from my dear friendies. What would you do without me?

    sub blog done as ordered.

    Good bye. (what happened to shortening them?)

    x ๐Ÿ™‚

    p.s. have you been watching the apprentice? Its good.

    p.p.s. My maths teacher is having her wisdom teeth pulled out tomorrow. And she watches waterloo road and neighbours. She has a tattoo of pi on her wrist (the symbol, not the number. duh.), and is slightly ginger, but very young and nice. I thought you might like to know. She set us homework, so she knew we would be in as much pain as her at the dentist. fun times.

    how about your teachers? x ๐Ÿ™‚

    p.p.p.s. You remebered my friendies names!!! Your good!!! But jemma wasn’t there when you sent that text. x ๐Ÿ™‚

    after another essay long comment, where i have written so much, i actually can’t remember how to spell lenght/lenthg (the word that is opposite to width), i really am going now. sorry about that. you DID ask for a sub-blog, but at this rate, its gonna be longer than the actual blog.

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  11. ooops. that was a long one. Soory everyone else, who has absolutely no idea what im waffling on about. just skip the really long comments and read on past it. Don’t bore yourselves.
    x ๐Ÿ™‚

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