In Which I Cannot Articulate So Overcompensate With Pink Font

Given that since I’m self-employed, weekends can technically happen whenever I like; there’s nothing to stop me from taking Wednesday and Thursday off, for example, then working the actual weekend. But I still quite enjoy the quietness of Sundays.

Oh wait there is a thing to stop me and it’s called money. I work during the weekend too!

Anyway, today I was feeling that feeling that’s really hard to describe except by writing ‘eugh’ or ‘bleh’, but whatever it is I was experiencing it this evening so I buried myself in Pride and Prejudice with a mug of hot chocolate and briefly pretended I was the main character in a bad romantic comedy. To be totally honest part of me is still pretending a little bit… Reading a really compelling book always makes me feel a million times better, like a really good sleep.

Found on Tumblr, origin unknown
Found on Tumblr, origin unknown

I was about to say that reading decent work also makes my writing better but I just read all that back and I think it might take a couple more literary masterpieces to improve my conviction that I should type using as few commas as possible. See.

But I have remembered that if I want to write well then I need to read well and have resolved to get down to my library and possibly actually read The Fault in Our Stars. Or Hitchhiker’s Guide. Or The Fellowship of the Ring. Or something that isn’t my Tumblr dashboard.

Maybe I just really need to spend less time on the same five websites, most of which are full of the same type of ‘WE WILL TALK AND YOU WILL LISTEN BECAUSE WE ARE THE ONES TALKING’ people. You know the type; they think that because they’ve carved out a cute little corner of the Internet, they deserve to be listened to and respected in every other corner of the Internet.

Or maybe I ought to just work out a better work/play routine than the one I currently have. Due to its inherent lack of structure and reliance on social media it often sees me in ‘work mode’ in inappropriate places, like during films or on trips to London, but then during the day (after a night of dodgy sleep because have I got that copywriting email begrudging me £2.50 yet?) I’m exhausted and slump on the sofa watching awful adverts with some TV sandwiched between.

Right, I’m off to work on Jacki’s MCR poem to clean my room to have a bath. Sod it I might go back to Lydia’s elopement with Wickham.

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April Fools Are for Sissies. Here Are Some Words Instead.

It’s the first of the month and it’s sunny, which I think means that a spot of spring cleaning is in order…

The Webways is hiring a social media administrator to help out with running the place. If you like MCR and you have an hour or two a week to spare, please please apply. It pains me to say it, but I can’t run it by myself any more. I know, I thought I’m infallible too. But it turns out I’m not, I’m actually really busy – and if any of my projects are going to be as great as they can be, I have to start delegating or I’ll loose my mind brilliant standards more sleep. Please no, I have exams soon.

Speaking of exams, a few months ago I was chatting to Ellen and Isobel about stuff I could make that hasn’t been made but should have been, and between us we came up with this:

Weekly Revision Timetable by Francesca Burke

I Photoshopped it my very own self and it works. No more shitty frills and stupid font, no more space that’s taken up by crap executives think you need… just a revision timetable (or general planner, now I think of it) that lets you plan your revision. Did I mention it’s available here for a fraction of the price of a notebook you’ll never use? All proceeds go toward funding this place and The Webways, of course, which reminds me:

I was being serious about this funding idea. I don’t have a lot of spare cash and I really, really don’t want to sell advertising space. I know I don’t blog as much as I used to – hi again exams – and I know that nobody likes posting comments or spending more than 0.5 seconds on a webpage these days, but I do quite love this site. I have high hopes for her, in the same way one has high hopes that their pets will learn to swim.

From corgianddachshund.tumblr.com
From corgianddachshund.tumblr.com

I may or may not be building a collection of animal images and GIFs for use in every available post. Anyway, pleaseplease let me know if you’re into the idea of a writing/art-money exchange, or if you have any other suggestions. (Personally I would like an Indifferent Ignorance-coloured bobble hat and Webways mug and coaster but I don’t think there’s a market for either. Unless there is. I don’t know unless you tell me. Damnit these brackets need to end soon.)

Spoon Keyboards and Snakes Being Freaky

I am typing this on my new computer and using an ergonomic keyboard which is curved like an upside-down spoon. It has lots of short cut buttons that I’m eagerly anticipating using in my quest to become a Serious Writer Person… new computer, new start and all of that. Except I don’t have Microsoft Office or Photoshop and I spent about 75% of today asleep… also the spoon-keyboard is a little bit daunting. But I have a cup of tea, which is a necessity if one is to become a well-respected artiste, so all I need now is something to talk about…

Okay so first of all, my friend Hollie who hangs out here sometimes has started a blog of her very own. She only has one post so far but it shows promise of greatness. If you could all leave a comment and say hi it would be great, not only for her as a person but also because, as I understand it, female gamers are seriously under-represented and Pixel Scum is evening the playing field!

Right now down to business. Did you guys see this news story? Holy bats. I mean, the snake basically looks like the average human just after New Year…

Found BBC.co.uk
Found BBC.co.uk

… but snakes get to unlock their jaws.

Found BBC.co.uk
Found BBC.co.uk

Argh it’s been a week since I saw that and I’m still freaking out that Nagini will slither round the corner and eat my face.

In the interest of grossing you out further, a few years ago a Python tried to eat an alligator and exploded.

(I solemnly swear to never complain again when Fred or Donnie yawn in my face. Dog breath is bad but snake breath sounds like it should be toxic.)