It’s a Kleenex conspiracy to stamp out people who are different by making them feel inferior. Although, if I was Head of Tissue Box Design at the Kleenex HQ, I wouldn’t use sheep, I’d use teenagers. Much more imposing… Also less likely to induce a racism row, methinks.
Category: May 2010
My Fate Is In Your Hands… Don’t Drop It.
I have caught the sun on my shoulders, arms, chest and back. Yes, ‘catching the sun’ does mean sunburn. I’m pretty dark so I always forget, when the sun comes out, that I need sun cream. Now it’s painful to wear a rucksack. The reason I got so, ahem, tanned, was that […]
“Is my skirt too short? It is? Good. Screw you.”
I thought I’d take a moment from everything that’s been going on and point your attention to the excellent new header I uploaded thirty seconds ago. It is staying up there for approximately eight million years, as that is the amount of time it took to match the colours to the format I write in […]
It’s Raining Outside…
… And I can see a seagull flying above the trees in the next street outside my window. I have nothing to add to this, I just think that everyone should look out the window and enjoy the rain. Appreciate the wind, maybe watch Doctor Who if you missed it yesterday. This is […]
Emoshit
There is really no excuse for slitting your wrists. There’s an excuse for self-harming, definitely – why do alcoholics become alcoholics? I listen to Mindless Self Indulgence loudly, people smoke or take drugs, get addicted to daytime TV. There are a lot of people in the world who don’t like themselves, and I’m […]
“I’m not worried about the rapists in the open camp, but I am about the dozens of fuel bottles anyone could set light to.”
Good evening. I am very glad that even famous in-laws go to great lengths to prove they like each other: I love my feet. Also my thighs. Back. Arms. Shoulders. Kneecaps. Shower. I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned I am partaking in the Duke of Edinburgh Bronze Award Scheme, and in case […]
I. Am. Not. A. Freaking. Genius.
My mother embarked on holiday to Greece yesterday with my aunts and has left my dad, my brother and I to look after ourselves for a week. Can’t say I blame her. I was kind of dreading it because it’s a Duke of Edinburgh expedition on Saturday, and I have English coursework due […]