In Which I Cannot Articulate So Overcompensate With Pink Font

Given that since I’m self-employed, weekends can technically happen whenever I like; there’s nothing to stop me from taking Wednesday and Thursday off, for example, then working the actual weekend. But I still quite enjoy the quietness of Sundays.

Oh wait there is a thing to stop me and it’s called money. I work during the weekend too!

Anyway, today I was feeling that feeling that’s really hard to describe except by writing ‘eugh’ or ‘bleh’, but whatever it is I was experiencing it this evening so I buried myself in Pride and Prejudice with a mug of hot chocolate and briefly pretended I was the main character in a bad romantic comedy. To be totally honest part of me is still pretending a little bit… Reading a really compelling book always makes me feel a million times better, like a really good sleep.

Found on Tumblr, origin unknown
Found on Tumblr, origin unknown

I was about to say that reading decent work also makes my writing better but I just read all that back and I think it might take a couple more literary masterpieces to improve my conviction that I should type using as few commas as possible. See.

But I have remembered that if I want to write well then I need to read well and have resolved to get down to my library and possibly actually read The Fault in Our Stars. Or Hitchhiker’s Guide. Or The Fellowship of the Ring. Or something that isn’t my Tumblr dashboard.

Maybe I just really need to spend less time on the same five websites, most of which are full of the same type of ‘WE WILL TALK AND YOU WILL LISTEN BECAUSE WE ARE THE ONES TALKING’ people. You know the type; they think that because they’ve carved out a cute little corner of the Internet, they deserve to be listened to and respected in every other corner of the Internet.

Or maybe I ought to just work out a better work/play routine than the one I currently have. Due to its inherent lack of structure and reliance on social media it often sees me in ‘work mode’ in inappropriate places, like during films or on trips to London, but then during the day (after a night of dodgy sleep because have I got that copywriting email begrudging me £2.50 yet?) I’m exhausted and slump on the sofa watching awful adverts with some TV sandwiched between.

Right, I’m off to work on Jacki’s MCR poem to clean my room to have a bath. Sod it I might go back to Lydia’s elopement with Wickham.

The Six O’Clock News: Pizza on Flights, Unless You’re Prevented from Flying by a Faulty iPod, etc.

Presuming that I don’t have my electronics/right to fly removed, when you read this I will be either asleep or eating, which isn’t a huge difference to normal, although it will be a) eight o’clock where I am, and b) I won’t have a clue if it goes wrong because my one holiday rule is that I ignore the Internet. But I’m not ignoring you, right? I’ve rigged up some magic so you can read this!

Here is a fun travel story about a pilot who bought his passengers pizza when they were stuck on the plane for hours. Pretty sure there’s a Cabin Pressure joke to be made somewhere…

This isn’t news, and it’s too big to upload as a picture, but I think everybody needs to see Aeroplane Sleep Positions and contemplate the best way to keep comfy on a flight.

(There isn’t one.)

Quick Art Update

I usually just post these things in Twitter and/or Tumblr posts but they’ve all cropped up in the last couple of days so I thought I may as well do a proper post… Ahem.

I got an email earlier that most of my Etsy shop’s listings are expiring really soon, so if you’ve ever fancied any of what’s there head on over ASAP. Plus I am going on holiday for ten days on Friday so any physical orders after the 11th July won’t be shipped until the 23rd at the earliest, by which time most of those items will have gone. So get on it!

Society6 is having one of its free-shipping-on-most-items days if you follow this link and this link only. It’s weird and they don’t tell you how long the offer lasts, presumably to whip you up into a frenzy. It’s until the 13th according to that very link.

I’m currently taking story commissions on DeviantART (all the info is on the right hand side below the advert). Once again, when I’m away I will technically be on holiday so if you request anything then you won’t get a response for a few days.

I hate doing what are effectively sales pitch blogs but at least this way it’s one lone social media post, as opposed to eighty over the course of a day… plus this trails on nicely to what I really want to talk about, which is HOLIDAY READING.

You know the drill. I take more books than I can carry, I read most of them, set up blogs talking about them and always include one novel that is totally depressing and/or gross. The first year I did it I took Trainspotting, which I haven’t read since; last year was We Need to Talk About Kevin which I then chose to study for my A Level and never want to read again… the further I explored it, the more effed up it became. I think this year will be Goodnight Mister Tom, which I have never previously read because I saw the TV adaptation about ten years ago, got so distressed I cried and have refused to open the book ever since.

But I’ll probably take this fortnight’s Private Eye and The Son of Neptune so it’s okay! There will be laughs all round! I will also take a book of codewords because since I stopped going to school my vocabulary has been on the downturn, which is bad for everybody. If I’m not careful I’ll only be able to speak in dog chatter… “Don Don, why are you barking? No one cares. Shhh. Hello Fred. You look very handsome. Go away that was my flapjack. Snuggles time.”

I love snuggles time. Speaking of which.

From goldenstories.tumblr.com
From goldenstories.tumblr.com

Blog Stuff and a Minor Rant About ‘Blurred Lines’

‘Sup snowflakes. I’m going to write a poem about hayfever. I’ll print it out on fancy paper and sell it on Etsy with links to tissue manufacturers.

Anyway I have to stop discussing illness here. Maybe I’ll start a whole new blog for it, just a little Tumblr or something. Like the one Jay made. Don’t read it if you’re under the age of 16. Actually I’d better work on current blogs first – the sidebar here is doing my head in because since WP stopped hosting the theme it’s been twice as tricky to customise links. I want cute and glittery things with pictures! But I don’t want to pay $30 for a WP upgrade! Because I don’t have $30! I’m seriously looking into merchandise options for here since it’s the five year anniversary really soon (I know) and it’d be nice to have something to celebrate. I’d also love to do a giveaway, but since I can’t afford merch to start with I think it’ll have to wait a while… I was thinking of using this place to make things – what would you guys like as designs or potential products? What’s your price range? I’m asking because you’re the people who’d be buying it!

Speaking of blogs, I’m going to put this documentary on The Webways soon. You should watch it and not just because I’m in it talking really fast.

Speaking of crazy fans, I just realised that I should probably update the Sherlock countdown since they have actually announced a new series… I was enjoying trying to maximise the timespan, my aim was to have it count down millennia…

I also feel like I should tell you guys that at my school prom the other night my friends and I were all “yeahhh dancing!!” then Blurred Lines came on and we were all “ewww bye!!” I have honestly never seen so many people simultaneously leave a dancefloor, it was almost good and almost as good as this. Yuck.

Okay I swear I had something else fun to say but since I can’t remember it I’m off to work on The Webways/write about hayfever.