Last week I got philosophical/grumpy about what it’s like being mere mortal during the Olympics, and in the spirit of WINNING THAT GOLD MEDAL, here is a list of ambitions I would like to have fulfilled by the next summer Olympics. There are other, more personal, things as well – but these are the things I want to brag (and complain) about publicly between now and summer 2020.
Finish a screenplay
And then have it optioned in record time by the BBC and win five BAFTAs. Obviously.
It doesn’t have to get anywhere (statistically, it would not get anywhere). I just want to finish one before I qualify for OAP cinema tickets.
Publish a book
I’d love to know the odds of getting a book published next to the odds of having a screenplay made, but since I would be responsible for almost all the content of a book, as opposed to one of many, many people making a film, I prefer my chances of actually holding a novel in my hand. Plus, I’ve had more practise. Still gotta double check how to spell practise, though.
Earn enough at 1-3 jobs that I don’t need 4-5 jobs
Half of all authors in the UK earn less than £10.5k a year, and although I will never be bothered about making a million pounds a week, I would like to have found something by 2020 that affords me the time and financial security to make things. In the mean time, my Patreon is here, hint hint.
Travel to every country in the EU before my lazy arse has to fill out paperwork to do so
Britain will have Brexited by Tokyo 2020, and there’s nothing like a deadline to spur one on to visit Slovakia while it takes minimum effort.
Where is Slovakia.
Travel to basically everywhere
I could probably stand to miss Baghdad, Aleppo and the North and South Poles, but places I haven’t been to yet that I want to write postcards from include but are not limited to:
- The Colosseum in Rome
- South East Asia
- The Giant’s Causeway in Northern Ireland
- San Francisco
- The Edinburgh Fringe Festival
- South America
I normally can’t stand these GIFs, but in the spirit of optimism… from Twitter.
Learn (or rediscover) a sport that doesn’t bring back horrible memories of PE
They never taught us aerial yoga, maybe I could try that… or trampolining. Ooh, or dog walking.
Pass my driving test
Possibly this is cheating because if I pass my theory test on Friday I will technically be half way there. Then again, I started learning in 2014, so let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I strive for Maggie Stiefvater-esque skill and style, but I think I’m going to be more like this:
I have some deadlines to attend to (and theory to study for) so I will leave this here and maybe revisit it on a periodic basis to brag/complain/mentally compare notes with the athletes aiming for Tokyo. Do you have any goals or four year plans? Let’s compare ourselves to Olympians together!