Once More Unto the Rain and British News Channels

I’ve made it back to England in one piece – not even a in-suitcase breakage – and am remembering the art of removing Wellington boots. Should ‘Wellington’ be capitalised?

I’ve also been re-learning the TV news, which is different from BBC app news insofar as I can exit the app with a flick of my thumb but the scrolling news ribbon on TV keeps me captivated even if I’m so disgusted by the article I want to turn off.

Good move, PR people.

Apparently the big story here has been that David Cameron won’t pay the EU some money, which is interesting having just spent a month in a country which has possibly the best claim out of all of us to not give the EU any cash. It’s also been kind of a bummer coming back to ‘NO MORE IMMIGRANTS’ news stories. Mostly because every time an EU/immigration/foreign people story crops up in politics it gives the tabloid press half a leg to stand on… but also because it’s embarrassing that some British people moan and complain about immigration laws but quite happily a) enjoy EU travel benefits, b) don’t want the jobs that ‘the foreign people are taking when they come to the UK’ and c) love travelling to Europe, love the multiculturalism and fantasise about bringing cute locals home.

Maybe it’s old fashioned, but I feel awkward when people are hypocrites. Anyway, here’s a picture of Zakynthos to make everyone feel better about the rain. I accidentally published it as a post a minute ago… remind me to learn how to use a mobile phone.

Laganas Beach

It’s the post-tourist season beach at Laganas, which some of you may know from the popular BBC3 programme Sun, Sex and Suspicious Parents, due to its popularity with party-going students. I’ve never made it down in the summer (I do not go on holiday to experience England with sun; Laganas is a lot like my local high street including a McDonald’s) but in October it was almost eerily quiet.

I’m Going to Test Your IQ.

  Today a policeman visited our school and told us that Facebook is a dangerous and fickle thing, so thank God we’ll have to pay for it soon, and who here has Facebook, and that’s most of Year Seven, and that’s illegal, don’t you know.

  As there are so many paedophiliacs out there, I thought I’d advertise myself to them by telling them all about myself!

  • I am a five foot seven willowy blonde with enchanting green eyes that are aways etched with pretty eyeliner. I was born in 1982.
  • I favour lots of jewelery, especially hoopy earrings, and I love floral patterns, Steve McQueen designs. My favourite shoes are my six-inch heels which I bought in London.
  • I excel at sport, I have run for England before now. I also do yoga everyday and can get my legs behind my head.
  • My favourite movie is Bride Wars, I am totally in love with Orlando Bloom and I am going to see JLS in concert this year.

  Have fun, old men with multiple identities, handcuffs in your car and a fetish for schoolkids. I hope you rot in hell.

  In other news, according to the stats on this blog, I have quite a few visitors to this here bloggie. Even if you subscribe and read this in an email, do me a favour and say something witty in the comment box. I’ll willingly meet you outside McDonald’s if you do.

  Tiffy Lindsey Hope Sofie Wrought-Smith VI